Transcription #1

from January 4, 2004

I must insist that this story has a happy ending. Rather, my editor suggested it; after all, America, Americans love happy endings. That is what sells. Nevertheless, be assured that though what they do to Agatha can only be described as brutal and shocking, she realizes the American dream. She is immortal. Benevolent, beautiful. Rich.

A goddess. A princess. A Saint.

And because she died young in her prime, she will always be remembered as beautiful and lovely, delicate and fearsome at the same time. Her legacy...

Was toward breast cancer research for which there is now a cure, thanks to Aggie. And it was for this cause which she might as well have presented her breasts upon a silver platter...

And while her sister wept bitterly, church bells rang across America in her honor...